Woah, it's past your bedtime!

     I seem to be drifting off into a bubble of comfort. Yesterday, I wondered what it would be like if things were different. If I could go back in the past and see where ive gotten to now. I wonder if I would have done anything different and how much my life would differ now. Maybe, but that’s something I will never be able to know.

   I’m enjoying this course so much I couldn’t of asked for one that fit my personality more than this one. I feel like I actually belong here, and that maybe I could be someone. That’s why I know I’m meant to be here, I’m here on this course for a reason. That reason I’m not quite sure for definite yet. I know that given myself this opportunity has allowed me to gain better experience in something I hold so dear to my heart.

    It’s nice to be able to enjoy and learn so much from the lectures. Each of the three of them. I appreciate learning 3dsmax for it’s complexity. Such a difficult programme takes time to nurture and learn the different tactics of creating and texturing a 3d model. This is one technique that I can truly say I’ve learnt a lot by, going from no knowledge of the software at all to what I’m at now. I have to say, I’m pretty proud of myself, no I might not be the best but atleast I’m trying and learning from my mistakes.

    Ahhh, visual design, such a vast variety of techniques and styles being learnt in such a fantastic and friendly environment. What more could an artist want? In college, we were taught to copy. Not steal and make it better, copy. This drove me absolutely insane. I love the artistic freedom we gain from Visual design, I love the environment that the lectures give us. I’ve never felt so comfortable in a learning environment. The drive to learn more is far greater than it has ever been. I love visual design.

   And critical studies, reminds me a lot of my film studies a level. I love being able to see films that I wouldn’t necessarily choose to watch. And give my own opinion and critical analysis of the films themes and cinematography. I’ve always been interested in why, what and how a film is given a certain edge and the reasons and techniques behind it. With the added benefit of learning about video games, it’s such an interesting and vast topic that we are just scratching the surface. I can’t wait to learn more about my love and addiction to video games and why. Three out of three of the topics in the course I love. How much better can this get?

   I thank my life for ever opportunity of letting me get here and the people that allowed this to happen.

Random Blog Entry

   Inspiration and Motivation;

“The great and glorious masterpiece of
man is to know how to live to purpose”
Michel de Montaigne

   With this in mind I can truly say that I have goals for my life. Does this mean ill stick to them? I doubt it, life has a way of messing up plans. But whatever is thrown at me I’ll try and make best of it. There must be a reason for life it’s just figuring it out that is the problem.

     It’s hard not to compare yourself to people in this industry, there’s always someone that’s going to be better than you. I normally just go cry in a corner, I hate the fact I can’t do things when I try so hard. It’s so difficult to get where you want. I’m such a competitive person, i strive to be taught and to be the best. I just need to stop making it all I think about. I need to try and look at myself in a different perspective, from now on I’m determined to see myself not as a failure but as someone who has got this far in life, looking back at my old drawings just proves that I have developed my own understanding of art and applying that to my work.  As Hugh Leonard once said “My life is every moment of my life. It is not a culmination of the past”

And as I once said “I’m lucky to have a life as good as this”.

CodeMasters

  Yesterday’s lecture from the people at CodeMasters was very insightful. I originally wanted to be a concept artists but the idea escaped me when I kept hearing that it would be physically impossible to get that job. The lectures taught me that whatever I want to do I just have to keep pushing for it and not loose hope. I believe I was allowed on the course for a reason, even though this is un known to me now, I see myself looking back in the future and thinking “Thank god I stuck with it and got my ass in gear”.

   The PowerPoint especially made me feel really enthusiastic; all the way through it I kept thinking that I wish I could just go home and spend the next 20 hours doing non-stop concept art. Ideas where floating all around my head, what brilliant ideas, I must get these down on paper. Before I knew it I was creating characters with back stories, environments for these creatures and their personalities. There wasn’t enough time to get them all down, the thoughts were all fighting in my brain to be on paper.

    I found some similarities between me and the CodeMasters workers, some things they were saying made me wonder if they were much different to me when they started out learning art.  This made me feel hopeful for the future. Whatever happens, I’m meant to be here, that I know for sure. Looking through the past weeks I can see how much I’ve improved on certain things. At college I felt that my art course was a chore, but now I really enjoy getting into it. For example, making a sculpture of my Reef character is such an interesting thing to be doing! And I feel like I’m making good progress. It feels so good to learn something new, I love being fed knowledge, I thrive to be taught, to be moulded into the perfect gaming artist.

    I need to get out of the mindset that I’m still in the school system. Go to school, have my mind brain-washed, go home, do homework, repeat the next day. This is right, this is wrong, there is only one way to do something. No, I need to go about my days with a different mind set. I need to get out of the feeling that I’m still in that crazy circle of acceptance and disruption.

WEARING MY BRAND NEW SHOES!

I really struggle with  titles D: haha....

    Wow, time does really fly when you’re consumed by your work!

I am absolutely buzzing after hearing the new homework for Visual Design! I’ve been spending a good amount of time thinking about it and I have some interesting ideas to be getting on with. I seriously love this kind of work, if I have time I’m planning on setting myself tasks like this every week or so (Depending on how much other work there is to do) Just pick a random word and develop a character on it, it really allows my imagination to get the better of me! So many ideas, it’s hard trying to get them all down before they are forgotten! I’m really enjoying it!!

    And the 3D work is really pleasing too! I’ve always been interested in cars all my life. As a little girl I wouldn’t bother with dolls and barbies and things, no give me a massive monster truck with shiny decals and sweet modified body kits. I then started a Car Mechanics course which was really fun, I learnt a lot about the anatomy and structure of a car and now I have my own car I’m slowly modding her. Starting with the inside as it doesn’t affect the painful insurance costs, but anyway, it feels really good to be excited about the van topic, I have always loved cars and too be able to try to model and texture one is pretty amazing.

    Good times were had by me. :D

TAKE A PICTURE WE DON'T CARE.

     When i think of something good to write on my blog I sit down at the computer and my mind goes totally blank. Typical.

      The other day it occurred to me to think for a while (As I don’t do much of that often?!) about how much someone’s opinion differs as to regarding what makes a game “good”.

    For me, it’s how the audience and the game “interact” with each other, I like games that really make me feel as if it’s actually me there, slicing people’s faces off or driving an exotic muscle car off a cliff or some random act of stupidity that if you were to try in real life you’d surely be locked up for. It gives me the chance to be someone totally different, forget about the past, stop worrying for the future and not give a flying pancake about anything. Now that’s the reality I like.

   But I look at some games and think “How is this fun?”. I recently watched someone play a game which I found incredibly boring and ridiculous (To save my sanity, I’ll leave out the title) Being cliché is one thing, I think everything is kind of “cliché” now because most ideas have been done but oh my days! This one really had me bored! Predictable, mindless and irritatingly annoying! Most of the time i enjoy games, but some I just find really hard to cope with.

    Oh another thing I wanted to mention which really destroys games are the fans. So many times I have really liked an idea (Not just with games) and I think to myself, “yeh this could work out”. But then the flow of mindless fans start loving it and anyone with a different opinion to them will be cobbled up with hatred and anger, they screw with the storylines, mess up the characters and basically change it to be suited to just them. Them and their “Precious”. I appreciate fans with a good reasoning behind there likes, ones that are willing to hear others opinions because without fans there wouldn’t be anymore games. But when people just like something because it’s a fad or “OMG111!!11 he has anime hair!!!1!!! Instant like!!2!one!” It gets very infuriating.  

   Well this drawing isn’t going to get itself done and this blog has just given me an excellent idea. I get inspired from the most randomest of things! MAN THE WORK STATIONS, SHARPEN THE PENCILS IT’S  TIME TO GET MY DRAW ON!

Updated? Surely not!

   Haven’t updated in a while so I thought I should write some mindless dribble about my day.

   I’ve really enjoyed the new experience today of drawing without looking at the page to try and train our brains. It was interesting to try something that I’m not used too, and the finishing images where diabolical! It probably didn’t help that I was rolling around laughing. The whole feeling from today was a positive one, it was nice to see everyone having fun and enjoying it.

    The morning session was something I found really entertaining. I’ve always enjoyed drawing models because I find it so difficult. I could see my progression however, throughout the sketches from the day. At least they are actually starting to look like people now. The time limit was a big hurdle for me to get over, on my first drawing I’d only managed to produce a very inaccurate circle for the head and part of a torso. Speed is something I definitely have to get used too. The laid back atmosphere and general positive experience left me feeling really comfortable working in this kind of environment.

   The second session was very motivating, I’ve always enjoyed learning about the way the brain works and how people react to different things. So having to forget everything I learnt about looking at the shapes to get them accurate had to be forgotten for the session. The random scribbles reminds me of an artist I once studied called Paul Kenton. I liked his style when I first saw it so it was good to be able to recreate something that looked in a similar style.

    Today has definitely been a very uplifting day, enjoying the work and the good laughs has really inspired and encouraged me to try different things.

    Is it “geeky” to say I’m actually enjoying the homework? Yes. Yes it is.

 Image by Paul Kenton

Monday 12th December

Monday 12^th December.

    Just a quick update on all thing Game Art….

    Game Production: Finished my tree project off today and handed it in. It took me a while to figure out how to unwrap and texture it. I had a lot of trouble but in doing so, have learnt useful tips on how to tackle something with similar properties. I couldn’t have got by without the help from my friends. I feel I could have done them better, so over the next few weeks I’ll hopefully have time to practise it, putting the tricks that I learnt into practise so that the difficult layout of the programme will seem easier and will be firmly stored in my head. This way I’ll be able to produce better quality 3D items that I feel pleased with. Overall, I’m happy at how I tackle the projects that have been set, as I have had no experience with this type of software before, so the bits that I’m learning are very interesting, I’m just finding it a little difficult to grasp all the different ways of rendering items, and trying to cope when 3DsMax has a fit.

     Visual Design: I have been attempting to do more drawings than before to try and get my hours up. I find myself enjoying it and being pleased with some of the final results. I seem to get into this mindset where I’m lost in my drawing. In my A-level art, I would find it hard to get “hyped” up by any of the topics or to feel motivated to do my best. Thankfully, I’m really enjoying the drawing topics here. I don’t realise the time quickly escaping me as I try new techniques and rendering. I feel excited when I draw now, because I want to see what and how I can improve! I’m also really pleased with the topic of the next project, however, I’m going to have to plan my time more wisely. As this is a major problem for me.

    Critical Studies: I’m hoping to add lot’s of variety to my blog from now on. I always have good ideas stored up in my mind, but when I sit down at my desk and whip open Microsoft Word my mind ends up going blank. And when I do write something, it’s either really boring or inappropriate. Which is why I write this entry today. I feel like it’s a good chance to see how my views and opinions change when I look back and if I act on any of the negative notes I have made today, so that I can improve.

    Gaming: I’m in the mood for some scary games, even though I tend to chicken out quite easily…..